Psalm 31

I took a class tonight, learning about Psalm 31. It was not at all what I expected. As I listened to the words, and the translations, and the teaching and the explanations, I felt a little bit of the heaviness in my heart start to lift away. I made a commitment tonight to try to love and forgive myself. I did everything I could possibly do and I did it all with every bit of love and caring that I had inside of me. I deserve love and forgiveness. I deserve to stop beating myself up for not being good enough.

"I seek refuge in You, Shekhinah; may I never be disappointed; as You are righteous, rescue me. Incline Your ear to me; be quick to save me; be a rock, a stronghold for me, a citadel, for my deliverance. For You are my rock and my fortress; You lead me and guide me as befits Your name. You free me from the net laid for me, for You are my stronghold. Into Your hand I entrust my spirit; You redeem me, Shekhinah...

"...I trust in Shekhinah. Let me exult and rejoice in Your faithfulness when You notice my affliction, are mindful of my deep distress, and do not hand me over to my enemy, but grant me relief. Have mercy on me, O Shekhinah, for I am in distress; my eyes are wasted by vexation, my substance and body too. My life is spent in sorrow, my years in groaning; my strength fails because of my iniquity, my limbs waste away.

"Show favor to Your servant; as You are faithful, deliver me. O LORD, let me not be disappointed when I call You; ... How abundant is the good that You have in store ... for those who take refuge in You. You grant them the protection of Your presence... You shelter them in Your pavilion... Blessed is Shekhinah, for you have been wondrously faithful to me, a veritable bastion. Alarmed, I had thought, “I am thrust out of Your sight”; yet You listened to my plea for mercy when I cried out to You. So love Shekhinah, all you faithful; Shekhinah guards the loyal, and more than requites him who acts arrogantly. Be strong and of good courage, all you who wait for Shekhinah."'